Showing posts with label Satanic. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Satanic. Show all posts

Tuesday, 6 August 2013

Review : The Conjuring (2013)





Well hello again! 

The Horror Hotel is re-open for business. 

The perils of a new job, a new lifestyle, and taking a kicking from an 'as-yet-unspecified' illness, have led me to distance myself from the world of horror for a spell. I've been reading horror literature like a beast, (take a bow, Bryan Smith),  but I haven't really been grooving on the genres cinematic output. Too much going on, as it were. A mind unsettled makes for a poor companion in the cinema stalls...

That all changed when, out of the blue, I learned about a new horror film; (a ghost story to be precise), centered around the famous paranormal investigators, Ed and Lorraine Warren, (they of Amityville notoriety). A movie based on what they personally felt was their most disturbing case, and one kept under wraps until very recently, (and I won't divulge any details here). How could I resist? I love a good paranormal tale, even though by daylight I'm as skeptical and logical about such matters as can be; there's just something inherently terrifying on a primal level about a well-told spook story that never fails to freeze me blood and cut my imagination loose. As a rule, I always watch ghost stories alone, in the dark, with the shadows creeping around my shoulders for maximum effect as, (and all you horror aficionados will agree, I'm sure), it gets very hard to find effectively scary material out there. The more you watch and are exposed to; the less you tend to morph into a squealing little bitch.

Saturday, 3 November 2012

Review : Paranormal Lack of Activity 4 (2012)



Authors Note : First of all, lemme just say HAPPY HALLOWEEN to everyone!

Sorry it's so belated, but my Internet was down for an extended period of time, and unfortunately, it happened just as our fave time of year came calling. So be it, gotta take the rough with the smooth, man. I did manage to watch a ridiculous amount of Horror during the season, as is my duty and my passion, and have a tidy little backlog of films to set about reviewing, (including, of course, THE WALKING DEAD S3E3). Bear with me folks. Now, onto the first of this months reviews....

Oh, and this review/rant will feature some spoilers, as its impossible to detail the films myriad flaws without exploring some of the plots more ridiculous twists. I'll keep the spoilers to a minimum, guys, although there's really nothing to spoil.

PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 4, should you not already be aware of this, is a full-tilt  disaster. I'll just throw that out there right off the bat for anyone who may be about to make the dire mistake of paying to see this nonsense. I'll give my reasons why its such a mess in due time, but in the slim chance your glancing at this review just as your putting on your jacket and heading for the door; mark my words.....do NOT pay to see this thing.

Buy something nice for your better half. Buy some Scotch and drink yourself good-looking. Hell, give your money to that homeless fella with the winning smile outside your local cornershop. I guarantee you'll feel better about yourself for doing it, and he deserves it a fuck-sight more than the makers of this franchise killer, even if he is sniffing bath-salts.

Speaking of the franchise; I'm a fan, by the way...

Monday, 8 October 2012

Review : V-H-S (2012)



Now here's a fresh idea...

Get together some well known names in independent cinema/horror cinema together and set em to work on a horror anthology. Not just any horror anthology, but a found footage horror anthology. How bout them apples?

This premise has understandably got a lot of horror fans excited. Its trying something new, and the wealth of talent on display has to point to good things abounding. Not to mention VHS is getting great reviews from tit to top-hat, as all and sundry praise it as a 'gem', and one of the years best. I wasn't buying the hype then, and I'm not buying it now.

I'm in the minority, but I often feel that anthologies don't quite work as a whole, (other than the mighty TRICK 'R' TREAT and CREEPSHOW). While they can be fun, they feel more like fast food than a hearty meal, and almost always lack depth, character and balance. Not to mention your practically gaurenteed at least one weak-sauce short story in there. Its a given. So, you can see why my excitement levels were running pretty low for this one.

Monday, 24 September 2012

Book Review : The Bighead by Edward Lee



Jesus, where to begin with a novel like THE BIGHEAD....

Anyone who's dabbled in the fetid, murky waters of author, 'Edward Lee' will generally know what to expect with this one.The man is not celebrated for his sense of restraint. In fact, of all the modern generation of underground horror writers, Lee is perhaps the most notorious. His deeply alarming imagination and total lack of respect for literary censorship has seen him produce some of the most disgusting and morally reprehensible works of all time; the sort of shit that would give Marquis De Sade a case of the flaccid Williams.

A brief history for the uninitiated...

Lee could be considered part of the second wave of horror that began in earnest with the late, great Richard Laymon and his pals. A form of literary horror that came to be termed, 'Splatterpunk'. In this most infamous of genres, nothing is left to the imagination. Theres an unspoken contract between writer and reader that the work will most probably be upsetting, will definitely be violent in content and graphic in the extreme, and on rare occasions, may leave you questioning your worth as a human being. You may come to regard yourself as something of a pervert for enjoying this stuff.

Without stroking my own chain, I must state that I have read a huge number of the books that have grown from this artistic ideal. Laymon, Keene, Ketchum, Smith, Little and many more have reshaped the way I think of horror fiction. Stephen King and the like seem like kids stuff these days. Literally. Their work feels like a rights of passage before you get to the really fun stuff. I love King, Koontz and chums, but I prefer a harder kind of horror.

Edward Lee is as hard as it gets. He's a man gifted with a rare sense of the grotesque, yet one bolstered by a vision that is often grandiose and epic in scope. In CITY INFERNAL and its sequels, he envisioned hell as a city; too vast to truly comprehend and filled with terrors and tortures that make the christian hell look like Disneyland. Also of note, he's a man with an undying love for the works of H.P.Lovecraft, and like many of his peers, he often dives headfirst into the mythos created by the great man, while taking it further...much, much further. These are fine tools to have in your armory if your heading out into the world as a horror author. Lee sits at the top of the pile.

I've read a great deal of his work, and going into THE BIGHEAD I thought I knew what to expect. But with this charming little tome, the man goes above and beyond anything I've ever come across in the genre, by far. THE BIGHEAD is the single most demented, disgusting and unforgivable piece of exploitation fiction to ever break free unrestrained from the human psyche. Suffice to say, I loved it.

It's the only novel I can recall with which I've stated to myself, that,  'I ain't reading one more page of this sickening filth!', only to throw the book down, stare at it in disgust for a few minutes, then pick the fucker back up and start reading again. When a piece of art can disgust and attract me simultaneously to its dark dementia, I have to hold it in respect.

I wont give away any of the countless scenes of unthinkable perversions in this book, but I will say that it is guaranteed to shock even the most hardened reader. Its balls are huge, the attention to detail is sick-bag-on-standby stuff, and the relentlessness of the darkness that pervades the tale is exhausting, but its just so damn well written that you cant let it go.

Herein ye shall find a giant mutated hillbilly/monster, (who's sexual and culinary habits are unspeakable even in this here Hotel), a pair of demonic Nun's sent from the pits of hell to habitually torture and rape, a helpless priest in the most vile ways ever written, a sex-addict who can't get enough junk in her trunk, two moonshine trading serial killers who know no limits, a self mutilator who goes to ridiculous extremes, and behind and surrounding it all, a dark, demonic mystery as to who the 'Bighead' is, and  how this disparate group of fuck-ups, psycho's and devils all relate. Its sheer brilliance.

The gore, of course, is often almost unbearable, and takes up a huge chunk of the narrative, but its all for a purpose which will not become clear lest the reader mans up and trudges along till the climax. Hell, Its not like the journey ain't fun. Its so sick and twisted that its often laugh out loud. Hopefully, your not taking this stuff too seriously. The explicit violence is smartly balanced with a sly, degenerate wit that manages to make the whole thing not only bearable, but hugely enjoyable. There are so many twists and turns here, in what seems to be a simple tale, that your left in no doubt by the novels heartless, darkly humorous finale, that what you just suffered through was a work of unmitigated genius. Were this nothing other than extreme gore and violence, it would simply lay claim to the most disgusting horror book ever written. A sort of 'Snuff Novel', if you will. But with Lee's precision storytelling, a deeply involving mystery, and some fascinating and perfectly realized characters, the whole thing becomes nothing less than a classic of its time.

Most wont be able to handle Edward Lee's THE BIGHEAD. Its his most repulsive work, after all, and that's no small feat considering the mans other tales. Though in many ways, its his most accomplished work also, and boasts his most memorable characters, and scenes, (oh, how I wish those scenes were less fucking memorable).

Those of you who take up the gauntlet and manage to read the damn thing will most likely feel ashamed of yourselves for doing so. Questions will arise in your soul as to what the fuck you were thinking. You may have to make some form of atonement for enjoying such a perverted work of the devil. You may pray for salvation for your rotten eternal spirit.

But when all is said and done, and you somehow convince yourself once again that your a good and moral person, the chances are you'll find yourself looking up at your bookshelf, seeing that damn disgusting book sat atop your pile, and without knowing, a smile will bloom on your face. You made it out in one piece.

Perhaps you'll make it out just fine the second time, too...

10 CRACKHEAD BLOWJOBS out of 10

Saturday, 25 August 2012

Review : The Cabin in the Woods (2011)


Director:

Drew Goddard

Stars:

Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth and Anna Hutchison

Five college buddies head out to a remote cabin for a weekend of beer, weed, sex and general grooviness, but soon after arriving, they find that, well, I'm not telling....

This will probably be a very short review, folks, and for good reason. If like myself, your a wise and experienced soul, you'll know to avoid all trailers, spoilers and amatuer reviews of this little ditty, (and horror in general, as it happens). Its a film that simply sings if you know nothing about it going in. Hell, it sings anyway, loudly and beautifully. The impact is far greater though, if your out of the loop entirely.

Its no secret by now that what seems like a template horror scenario is turned upside down, spun around, shot full with head-fuckery and let loose on the populace, but boy, does the film impress, hyped or not. This is what horror cinema is all about people. Its a perfect example of why the genre inspires so much love in its audience. Its creativity is boundless, its execution is perfect in every single way, and its just about the most fun I've ever had watching a horror movie in my life.

Monday, 23 July 2012

Review : Rec 3 -Genesis (2012)


Director:

Paco Plaza

Writers:

Paco Plaza (screenplay), Luiso Berdejo (screenplay)
A couple's wedding day turns into a horrific events as some of the guests start showing signs of a strange illness. 

What in Gods name was Plaza thinking?

Rec 1 and 2 are among the most accomplished horror films of the past decade. Tense, terrifying and filled with invention, originality and a sense of real terror. They have become not only the standard for  hand-held horror, but beacons of modern horror in general; spawning a strong American remake, (and its sub-par yet watchable sequel reviewed here), and a ravenous fanbase.

Fans wanted more. More mythos, more story. An expansion of the surprising and  disturbing themes explored in the sequel. They could have taken this franchise all the way. It was a prime example of true horrors ability to elicit a primal response in the viewer. So, with a loyal, hungry fanbase and a limitless mythos to explore, what do they do?

They make a comedy.

Tuesday, 15 May 2012

Review : Ghost Rider - Spirit of Vengeance (2012)

 

 

Directors:

Mark Neveldine, Brian Taylor

Writers:

Scott M. Gimple (screenplay), Seth Hoffman (screenplay), and 2 more credits »

As Johnny Blaze hides out in Eastern Europe, he is called upon to stop the devil, who is trying to take human form.

I have to be honest with you folks, I never gave a rats ass about the original GHOST RIDER adaptation, either way. I enjoyed it as a popcorn, intellect-free escapist jaunt, but it never left any great effect for good or ill in my ole' bonce.

Before seeing it, the closest I'd come to this iconic character was listening to, (and loving), the song GHOST RIDER by minimalist drone-rock pioneers, SUICIDE. He sounded like a cool cat in that song, man, and if the visuals of the first film were anything to go by, he most likely was a cool cat. The characters visage is just about as iconic and bad-ass as it gets, and I'm assuming that he's a character who lends himself to the more heavy-metal friendly comic-reading audience. His origin is pretty fuckin ace too, and I hope one day to look into the character more deeply; but for now, I'm gonna have to review this sequel to his first cinematic foray as a plain old-fashioned film-fan.

I've heard the complaints leveled at the original movie, and the certain timidity it displayed, even when in comparison to other super-hero movies. It did feel lacking, even as a clueless popcorn muncher, I have to admit. Good news, then. The sequel goes some way to rectifying this problem.

Sunday, 6 May 2012

Review : The Devil Inside (2012)


Time can literally stand still...

Suffering through 'found-footage' fuck-up fest, THE DEVIL INSIDE is like vacationing in the abyss. Its an unending, mindbogglingly shit plummet into Satan's toilet bowl. Fit for consumption by none.

It takes a lot to get my rankle up when it comes to found footage films. It really does. I'm one of the few, ostracized souls in the horror field who actually sees great merit in the movies, (when done right, of course). Hell, the last movie I reviewed was a shaky-cam shocker, THE TROLL HUNTER, and it was deliriously engaging and entertaining. While I sometimes feel like I'll have to rename this place 'THE FUCKING FOUND FOOTAGE HOTEL', I still get a kick from these films. I'm at half mast just thinking about REC 3, I enjoyed the hell out of CLOVERFIELD and I can't bring myself to get on the vitriol wagon for the PARANORMAL ACTIVITY series, either. Its an immersive filming technique when done with panache.

THE DEVIL INSIDE is not done with panache. Nope. Not at all.

Saturday, 10 December 2011

Review : The Shrine (2010)

Director:

Jon Knautz

Writers:

Jon Knautz (screenplay), Jon Knautz (story), and 3 more credits »

A group of young journalists looking for the 'big break' investigate the disappearances of a number of travellers in rural Poland, but their ambitious ways may lead them to becoming the next victims of a sacrifice practising cult who may be behind the mystery. Ya think.....?

Its two days since I watched this little ditty, and though the weekend beckons, Ive put aside my Budweiser Lites and turned the music down low, in order to review this flawed yet relatively fun movie. I feel its worth it, as theres an enjoyable time to be had here, and its worth sharing.

I hate to lower the standards once again by writing the whole, 'something meets something' bullshit, but I really have to, here, so forgive me for my sins....

THE SHRINE is, essentially, the outcome of splicing THE WICKER MAN with HOSTEL. At least for the first two thirds. After that we head directly down 'EXORCIST alley', for our hokey and enjoyable finale. More on that later. For now, lets step back a bit, and have a look at this bad-boy from start to finish.

Monday, 14 November 2011

Review : 11.11.11 (2011)


Director:

Darren Lynn Bousman

Writer:

Darren Lynn Bousman (screenplay)

 
After the death of his wife and child, an author who has lost his faith in God, travels to Barcelona to visit his estranged brother, (a preacher) and dying father, where he  comes to realize that many important events in his life all seem relate to the number 11. As he investigates, he finds himself trapped in an ever-worsening nightmare that could herald the apocalypse. Demonic entities and Hellish visions begin to plague his every moment, as he comes to learn the terrible truth behind the mystery, and all the time the date 11-11-11 draws slowly nearer....

What the fuck happened?

 

Lets get this straight. I loved MOTHERS DAY. I enjoyed all of Darren Lynn Bousmans previous efforts, but I freaking loved MOTHERS DAY. (Heres the proof!). That film was vicious, unrelenting, intelligent and paced within an inch of its life. It managed to hold court with the French New Wave of Horror, and not embarrass itself, and it was one of the few remakes that not only surpassed the original, but kicked its teeth out and left it bleeding on the racetrack.. Bousman has been growing and growing as a filmmaker. The guy has serious skill's behind a camera and crew....

Tuesday, 30 August 2011

Review : The Devil's Rock (2011)

Director:

Paul Campion

Writers:

Paul Finch (screenplay), Paul Campion (screenplay)
Set in the Channel Islands on the eve of D Day, two Kiwi commandos, sent to destroy German gun emplacements to distract Hitler's forces away from Normandy, discover a Nazi occult plot that may help them win the war once and for all. 


Hands up those of you who don't get giddy at the idea of a Horror movie dealing with Nazi's and the occult. Anyone? Didn't think so. These two concepts are as endlessly fascinating today as they were when Micheal Mann directed THE KEEP, or when good old Indiana Jones was tackling the bastards back in RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK, and THE LAST CRUSADE. There is something inherently attractive about such a dark subject matter, even when its handled lightly, as in the Indiana Jones film's. It's widely known that Hitler had a compulsion towards the occult, and took the whole thing very seriously, adding an element of reality to any film that focuses on the subject. Sure its all fanciful stuff, but the viewer often find themselves asking that most eternal of all Horror fans internal questioning. What if?

Thursday, 16 June 2011

Book Review : Joe Hill 'Horns'

Joe Hill first came to my attention when I was fortunate enough to pick up his first novel, HEART SHAPED BOX, on impulse, a year or so ago. On reading the blurb on the back, I was instantly sold. ( A man who buys a ghost on EBay? Brilliant). I figured that the novel itself could never live up to such an original concept. Jesus, was I wrong. HSB was a brilliant read, and for a first novel it was damned near a miracle. Hill could have peaked with this first novel and been sailing high the rest of his career. Its that good.

With that in mind, when I picked up his second full length horror novel, HORNS, I was pretty damn excited to see where this guy would go next. I expected some pretty great things, but I never expected for a second that he would take the leaps and bounds that he has in this novel. HORNS is a masterpiece.

The concept, or at least all I KNEW of the concept, (and I advise you to take the same route), was that a young man awakens one morning after a heavy night on the sauce, to find he has horns growing out his head. That in itself lead me to believe Hill was onto a winner. I figured this would be a lighthearted tale, blending horror and comedy together in a breezy, fun filled jaunt dealing with satanism or witchcraft, and while there are some decidedly dark laughs to be found here; this book is deadly serious about its subject matter. It's by far one of the most emotionally devastating novels I've ever come across, matched only by Jack Ketchum's THE GIRL NEXT DOOR. HORNS broke my heart, but it does so much more.

Its hard to write about Hill's masterwork without giving away any plot details, or any of its many many twists. I will say that the revelations, and they come often, hit you full force in the psyche and in the heart. Yes, HORNS is a horror tale with supernatural overtones, but it goes far beyond a simple horror novel, and is infinitely deeper than I expected. Its also a very honest and insightful look at the frailty of true love. At the agonies and the ecstasies of being in that wondrous state. Its a fearless study of loss and the terrible toll it can take on the human spirit.  HORNS looks deep into the darkest recesses of the human heart and finds there both the capacity for infinite beauty, and irredeemable ugliness. It takes us for a ride down a very dark, very evil road, where the only light to guide our way is that of one mans desperate love, and desire for justice. Its powerful as hell.

And the one man I speak of is Ignatius Perrish, or Ig for short, and what a character. When we meet Ig, he's fallen a very long way, and his tale arouses immediate sympathy, (for the devil?). This is a guy like any one of us. He's made mistakes, and he's tried his best to be a good man, and its gotten him precisely fucking nowhere. Ig is instantly likable; a simple guy battling with tragedy who comes into demonic powers which may bring good or ill, for Ig and those he loves. Your with him all the way as he struggles with both the world around him and himself. If Ig is our guiding light, then its his love for Merrin, his soul mate, that shines out from within him, keeping us barely sane as we travel with him into the fire. Its Merrins presence in his heart that allows for his soul to stay essentially human, as he undergoes his dark transformation. The tale of doomed love that unfolds between these two ripped my heart out. This is one of only three books that has reduced me to tears, (one of the others being Ketchum's, TGND). Its a timeless love story, and one which dances around all the cliches and all the bullshit to get right to core of the reasons why we hurt those precious to us, often on purpose. These are real people and you may well see yourself in them. I know I did, in Ig.

To counterpoint the love so brilliantly explored here, there is its polar opposite. A villain so fucking despicable I often had to put the book down to get my head together. Hill explores in depth, the mind and 'soul' of this very human monster with just as much passion and insight as he does our 'hero's'. His actions and his mindset are revolting, yet very plausible. Its the blunt, mindless actions of this bastard that leads Ig on his hellish journey into self discovery. A better villain I've never come across. The book does contain some strong violence, and while for a guy like me that's always welcome, here the violence is very disturbing, and Hill is, wisely, far more concerned with the aftermath of violence than the act itself

The book also has a decidedly demonic vibe coursing through it, and asks very pertinent questions about what we think of as 'Satan'. The answers Hill arrives at may upset some readers, but that's to be expected. There are passages here that feel positively Satanic. One section called 'The Fire Sermon', ends with a scene so soaked in devilish imagery and wordplay, it rises to the level of mythic. New scripture for the unbelievers. This book may not be for those of the Christian variety, unless your curious about how the other half thinks, is all I'm saying.

So there you have it, Joe Hill has written a book that has taken my breathe away. I book so profoundly sad and human that I have to hold it among the very best I've ever read. Its a thriller, a horror, a beautiful love story, and a ferocious tale of good versus evil that every fan of horror, and of literature, would do well to read. HORNS is just wonderful.

10 out of 10